The Journey of Life
I have been infatuated with astrology since I was a kid. I remember my mom giving me a yearly Virgo horoscope book every year for Christmas. In my teens I would go to the local bookstore in the mall, sit on the floor in the "new age" section and read the books on astrology and dreams. My niche, my basis for my business is Human Design & Energy Healing, however, I love to continue my education and knowledge in astrology because for me having the scientific side with the planets and transits helps the knowledge ground in me that energy is truly everywhere.
As I wrote in the post a few days ago about what a woozy this last week was, I had no clue that that was going to continue into the week. I know from what I experienced, what my family has experienced, a phone call from a dear friend earlier today talking about the storm she went through this week and the posts on social media from connections about the craziness in their lives that the collective is experiencing this storm of energy. Whether you follow astrology or not, when we have transits, new moons, full moons, planets going into retrograde and solar eclipses they affect our lives-- some will understand that it's because xyz is happening astrologically, some will think it's just a crap show of a week-- either way they happen.
The key here is grounding yourself and your emotions the best you can when storms come through. Take a look at a rainstorm for example-- the dark clouds come rumbling in, the wind picks up, thunder and lightning make their mark and then the clouds open up and all the rain begins pouring out. The clouds need to release the moisture, and the earth needs the rain to nurture all of the beauty that needs the water to survive. This is just like our lives, we are going along, living our lives and all of a sudden, a storm comes- we get emotional we feel so many emotions, anger, frustration boiling to the surface, we begin to cry, our bodies start releasing through tears. Just like a rainstorm when it gets too intense internally, we need a release to reset.
I feel like this is what we are all feeling this week-- the combination of astrological storms manifesting into our reality. The biggest thing that I saw this week in myself and my family is hurt and feelings that we thought were healed rearing its ugly head again this week. I think one of the biggest things when we look at energy is our energy is like an onion, we heal one layer and another layer and so on... when we least expect it a layer that we already "healed" is back. This can get confusing (even for myself and I do this for a living!) we think to ourselves, why is this coming back up? I worked through this, why is it back and why am I feeling so emotional about it? What I have come to understand is a couple of things:
When a past hurt, memory, feeling is coming up again it is a time for you to reflect on how you are handling it differently now then from before it was "healed". This is showing up again to show you that you have grown so much and you are capable of handling those emotions, those feelings and how that has helped you grow.
That there is a message here, when stuff comes up from the past, what is it showing you that you need now? How have you changed? How have your needs changed? Are there suppressed feelings that need to be worked through? What do you need to learn from this as the you today to help you continue to grow and evolve?
Both of these were spot on for me this week. Things came up that I have worked through.
Emotions are running high, I learned that I need communication from the ones I love the most-- It bought up a limiting belief that I am unlovable, that I do not receive the love that I give. I know these beliefs are not true, but they came up this week to teach me that I need to give love with no expectation in return and that I need to communicate my needs. It also brought back a HUGE fear that I am going to lose the ones I love the most. This was amplified this week several times, from witnessing the car accident on Sunday, to a health scare, to being vulnerable in how I was feeling. In reflecting on this past week, I learned that I need to fall into really embracing my love languages... My strongest love language is physical touch, followed by quality time with a little sprinkle of words of affirmation. That I need to embrace this within me first so that I can communicate this to the ones that are important to me.
This was just a taste of what I was experiencing within my own world-- as in human design I am a defined emotional which means I can only feel my own feelings. I can empathize with others, but I can only feel my feels. I am taking in my storm and witnessing the storms of past hurt that is coming back up within the people in my circle. We have mercury retrograde bringing up the past, paired with the solar eclipse which signifies an ending so we can begin a new chapter. The two together are FIERCE... we are dealing with past hurt that we have worked through previously combined with the energy of closure-- that is INTENSE for even the most balanced person. When I look at everything that has come up for me this week, it is showing me to release the hurt, to release the pain, to release the fear so I can continue on my journey that is fueled by LOVE. I know what love feels like because I know what it feels like to be without love. We always need the negative to appreciate the positive.
I felt compelled to share this today because I think we all need to give ourselves GRACE and PERMISSION to feel our feels. We need to show COMPASSION and LOVE to not only ourselves but others as we all navigate this storm together. Remember that a storm will only last for so long and the sun will come out... do things that will help YOU weather the storm... this week I have had a reiki session from one of my energy healers, I have done several energy sessions on myself so I can stay balanced as I am facilitating energy sessions for my clients this week. I have meditated more than usual this week, I have journaled, I have laughed & cried and released emotions through tears & laughter. Most importantly, I have given myself permission to be human.
To all of you out there-- I know it's been a woozy-- know that you are doing the best that you can, you are allowed to have your moments, you are allowed to feel the feels and even when life gets hard and throws challenges your way... know that you are STRONG enough & CAPABLE enough to make it through to the other side.
I am going to end with this quote, I think we all are learning everyday how to love ourselves, this journey of life is not easy, the thing that gets me through, is love. I love with everything I have; I love intensely, I feel the hurt that life gives when we least expect it, but its love that gets me through.
" Believe me I know that I am hard to love, which is why I am going to love you the hardest" -- Unknown
xoxo gina marie